I am having to do something I don't want to do.
I've had to do that a lot lately and to be honest this weekend I just wanted to sit down on the floor, kick my feet and scream "I'm NOT doing it"!
Ever feel like that?
I think we can all think of times when we feel we've had to give too much, or compromise too much, or feel like a doormat, or wonder why the other person is not having to "give in".
That's where I was.
Fortunately, I've gained enough wisdom in 53 years that I stopped short of saying...and you can't make me! :)
God won't "make" me do anything, but if I am tuned into the Holy Spirit, He will reveal the attitude of my heart.
God knows just how to deal with my heart when I get like this...
...that day, BOTH of the devotions I am reading were on long-suffering!!
Sometimes He just doesn't beat around the bush!!
Sometimes He just doesn't beat around the bush!!
I love and hate it when that happens.
I hate it because it reveals my selfishness and that is hard to see. I love it because God brings my heart and focus back on Him in such a loving, gentle way.
He showed me that day that I had allowed my focus to shift to the behavior of others rather than focusing on the activity of God. It's amazing how quickly and easily that can happen.
When I am focusing on their behavior, I start coming up with all the reasons they don't deserve for me to do what God is asking. And frankly, they probably don't deserve it.
When I am focusing on their behavior, I start coming up with all the reasons they don't deserve for me to do what God is asking. And frankly, they probably don't deserve it.
But maybe, just maybe, God wants to use me in this situation in a way I had not even considered....in a way that is not even about me.
Only He knows.
But what I know is that I do NOT want to miss out on the blessing of joining Him in HIS activity....I'm ALWAYS blessed when I do. So......
kicking and screaming and saying I WON'T do it
VS
letting go of my pride and joining God in what He is doing
hmmmmm...
I know which I will choose....what about you?
I know which I will choose....what about you?
4 comments:
I chose kicking and screaming, thank you.
I'd much rather go along with God. There will be so much more peace later. Can't stand that guilty feeling. :)
Great post and thanks for the reminder Sara
LOL at Denise :) I don't to a lot of kicking and screaming. What *I* do is do it and grouse the whole time (sometimes even out loud).
I'm like a 2 yr old tantrum throwing kid a lot of times with God myself ... I need to pay attention to the attitude of my heart more.
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