Saturday, September 20, 2014

Trust....what does it mean?

 God has been working on my heart this summer.

He's given me the opportunity to "walk my talk"

As a pastor's wife, I have counseled many people to trust God in tough times and as the saying's easier said than done!

I've personally had many opportunities to trust God in my past, some harder than others.  But none quite as tough as this one.....losing our job....this storm seemed to swirl menacingly around meChallenging me to focus on it and fear it.

And even though God had lovingly prepared me to face this storm (go here to read about it), the waves at times have seemed so high and the wind so loud....deafening at times.

Yet God has made His voice heard in my heart over it all.

He has been showing me how to trust to put my faith in HIM, not the storm or any boat I may be riding in.


 The first thing was for me to remember that GOD was in control of my circumstance.....not the elders of our church, not our congregation, not the people around us, not even us.

And if God was in control, that means He allowed my circumstances.

Wow.  When I finally embraced that in my heart....that GOD orchestrated my circumstance.....any anger I had completely melted away.  How could I be angry at people, no matter their involvement, if God orchestrated and allowed it?

Now, I don't know about you, but I KNOW God loves me....
He has always taken care of me....
He has always provided everything I "need"... 
 He has always kept His promises.

So, if He orchestrated my situation, then I had to go back and look at this time with different eyes.  I had to go back and see what blessings and good things had come from the situation.

And you know what?

As I started writing things down, I filled a whole sheet of paper!!!

here's a few:

*Gave us a respite and time to heal and refresh
*Caused us to draw closer to some friends here than we had been before
*Allowed us to experience so much love from friends..close and far away
*Gave us time to build into Kristen and Jason and be available as they planned their wedding
*gave us time to be able to just pick up and go this summer for weddings (three!), time with my parents, time with Steve's mom (who had a bad fall and then a heart attack)
*we have been able to deal with all that has happened this summer without the stress of leading a church
*It has allowed me to see and experience that Steve and I truly enjoy each other (24/7 for 6 months!!!)
*has allowed me to witness to my family and friends what trusting God really is like and the PEACE it provides.
*has allowed me to truly WALK what I believe
*I have been able to SEE Him provide for us every step of the way...sometimes in pretty miraculous ways 

So many great things have happened that might not have any other way.
I can truly say that I am trusting God more today than I have ever in my life.  
We are still in the middle of this storm.  
But I choose to focus on God.
He's still using me every day.
He's still providing for me every day.
And I am at peace while I wait. heart is filled with JOY. 


Mari said...

What a wonderful testimony! I love the part about God being in charge. I know that too, and it's such a good thing to apply in hard times.
God has a plan and I can't wait to see how he works it out for you and Steve.

Lynne said...

Oh Sara, your entry made me cry. Because the words you are writing were for me, too. My husband and I are in a storm and have been for the past four years involving jobs, finances and our "dream home," which may end up having to short sale. Like you, I remember all the devotions that I had been reading and know God had sent them my way in order to prepare my heart for this season. I know all will be revealed one day and just keep praying for strength to deal with all the 'stuff' that comes our way. God is so good! God bless you both.

Lisa said...

Could not agree more, even in my own circumstances.

"No guilt in life, no fear in death, This is the power of Christ in me; From life's first cry to final breath. Jesus commands my destiny. no power of hell, no scheme of man, Can ever pluck me from His hand; Till He returns or calls me home, Here in the power of Christ I'll stand. "

He has a plan that is good for you and Steve.

Kimberly Hoyt said...

A good reminder for all of us that He is in control, and allows things for a purpose.
Praying for His continued provision and sustaining power in your life.

Sara@iSass said...

I love reading you posts Sara! I had my faith tested this past year, it was not easy to trust...but once I let go, and didn't try to clutch it load was easy, or lighter I should say. Lately I have felt my hunger for the word come back to me. It the storm it was all I could do to release the fear, but now I'm ready to study again, see what new things He has for me.
Reading your list brought joy to my heart! What blessings! I remember when Rob was out of work, as stressful as it was, it was a blessing to have that time with him. I will continue to pray for you both.

mer@lifeat7000feet said...

This is a beautiful list, Sara! I'm sorry for your "hard" but grateful that you see God's hand in all of it!

Karin said...

Such a great attitude! I've been wondering how you were doing with the stress of losing a job. Hugs!!